Escapism ... Robert Pattinson and Reese Witherspoon in Water For Elephants

This  is high romantic melodrama: Titanic on dry land, with the doomed liner turned into a Thirties travelling circus careering towards catastrophe.

The film even uses a similar framing device to James Cameron’s Oscar-winner, as one of the survivors, Jacob (played with plenty of ripe ham by Hal Holbrook), tearfully recalls the love of his life.

In his youth, he’s played by today’s aspiring Leonardo DiCaprio, teen heart-throb Robert Pattinson. The young Jacob is a Polish-American whose veterinarian studies at Cornell University are halted by his parents’ death in a car crash. 

He is also made homeless when he discovers his mother and father ran into debt to finance his education and the bank forecloses. ‘Perhaps, if you hadn’t gone to college, you’d still have a home,’ gloats the banker in a moment that hints of even beastlier melodrama to come.

The poor lad, stricken by grief, remorse and the Depression, hops on the first train through town. There’s a moment of magic where the circus train pulls up and our awestruck young hero watches it disgorge its bizarre contents. 

The scene where scores of workers erect a big top and attendant sideshows conveys wonder, excitement and joy that are rare in modern cinema.

It evokes old-fashioned Hollywood at its best, with epic production values and formidable organisation.

STARTING out like Titanic, older person corners young person to tell them a long story about their life - we're soon flashing back to Depression-era America for an adaptation of this best-selling novel.

Young veterinary student Jacob (Robert Pattinson) is about to take his final exams when bad news arrives - both his parents have died suddenly.

It's all too much so Jacob runs away and, not realising it would one day become a cliché, joins the circus.

This is a slice of pure Hollywood escapism, a beautiful-looking movie that will drag you away to a land of villainy and romance for its duration - but not a second more.

The villainy comes from circus owner August (Christoph Waltz), whose cost-cutting techniques involve throwing his workers from the moving train and who deals with his anger by punching an elephant.

The romance arrives as Jacob falls for star performer Marlena (Reese Witherspoon). The problem? Marlena is with the violent August.

Climbing out of Twilight's massive shadow is going to be a test for Pattinson and while he's on great form here, the theme of dangerous love doesn't stretch him far from Edward Cullen. Witherspoon is good too, although the pair don't have that spark of chemistry that makes for the best on-screen romances.

Waltz is the main attraction. As in Inglourious Basterds, he goes from quiet charm to terrifying violence and in the process acts every man, woman and elephant off the screen.

A visual treat and a fascinating look at circus life in a bygone era. If only this were a little more memorable. Even an elephant would forget it.

RATING: THREE OUT OF FIVE

Your weekend starts on a Friday with Sky Movies Premiere HD. Tonight Russell Brand stars as badly behaved rock star Aldous Snow in riotous comedy Get Him To The Greek at 8pm on Sky Movies Premiere HD - Sky channel 301.